Public speaking

[Total Sweetheart]

Ok this is random but ...

I had to give a 10 minute speech on Friday to about 100 people.

I don't consider myself shy, I'm really outgoing at parties and in small meetings, but I was literally sweating, felt like it was 100 degrees in the room, my heart was pounding, etc etc.

I didn't realize how uncomfortable I am with speaking in public to a large group!

I know this is a common problem, have any of you guys had this problem and tried to improve it? Any success? My mom told me I should join Toastmasters or something.

I want to get better at this so I don't feel so jittery because I think it will be a useful skill at work and just in general since I've always admired people that are good speakers.

[Trikkur]

The most obvious way to get better at it is to just practice a lot. Become a more social person in group settings so you feel comfortable talking to people you don't really know. I was in High School debate and some of the final rounds wouldn't get quite 100 people, but 50+ and speaking to them was nerve racking at first, but you sort of get used to it over time. When I went to college, it wasn't a big deal to me to do class presentations or anything because of my experience in debate.

I've been sort of a hermit these last few years since I quit college and started playing poker and running my websites. I wonder if this is a skill you can get out of practice with?

[urbansprawler]

I personally have no problem speaking to people. You just have to swallow it up and channel your fear into energy. If all else fails, just stand behind the podium, put your hand into your pocket, and squeeze your balls really, really hard. I discovered this awesome trick in Keeping Up With The Steins. It definitely helps to relieve some of the pressure.

[Total Sweetheart]

Originally Posted by urbansprawler

If all else fails, just stand behind the podium, put your hand into your pocket, and squeeze your balls really, really hard. .

I don't have any balls.

Literally.

lol

[urbansprawler]

[TheDeKay]

Just do it over and over again and practice to perform in front of many ppl... I played some piano concerts in front of maybe 200ppl or a bit more. After some time you really get used to it. I don't think, there is any other way.
What always helped me for presentations: Be really, really well prepared! I usually hold the presentation alone, just to test how fluently it is... you might want to cam it, so you can watch it afterwards and critique yourself with a cool head.

[zomfgwtfbbq]

Originally Posted by Total Sweetheart

I don't have any balls.

Literally.

lol

Does that mean you're not a guy? (I mean seriously blonde moment in mice thread)

Public speaking is fine for me. I used to train my debate team in my ex highschool (couldn't participate cause of local quota issues) and I went for model united nations in hong kong (when i was still back in south east asia).

It's all good for me but then I probably had more exposure growing up. Practice is the key and obviously knowing your speech well.

[Gambubble]

I used to be very very shy, a group of more than 2 was a big deal, even among family!...that was a real handicap that I had to overcome.
There is strickly nothing that you can't become confident with if you practice. The only way is to put you as much as possible out of your confidence zone, but very gradually and depending on your predispositions.

At first I used to practice alone a lot(!), creating the feeling of a crowed in front of me during my speech repetitions; I was able to make this quite vivid as I've always been an imaginative. Practicing is the only way to become really natural during a presentation. Acting is one of the best way to get used to large audience imo.

Also the more conviction you have in the subject you present, the more you are willing to share it with others, the more persuasive you become with less pressure.

The first five minutes of a presentation always was the hardiest part for me, after this I was able to overcome my fear and concentrate a lot more on what I have to say and everything came more fluently, the pressure disappeared as I were in my playground. That's why I used to learn only the beginning of my speech by hart, words to words, and then only concepts, and having sparse notes in front of me (the main points, the pitch), making my speech a lot more natural. Notes was mostly a reassuring point, I scarcely used them.

There was no real difference speaking in front of 30 ppl or 400, excepted in the fear I felt just before and at the beginning. Realizing that this fear was only in my head helped me lot to step back from that.

Not having doing this for a long time now, this skill should have fade away a bit, but it will come back faster this time if needed.

My guess is that you are a girl, I know very few real men able to not identify themselves with their balls... In both case, reverence.

[Total Sweetheart]

[QUOTE=zomfgwtfbbq;28457]Does that mean you're not a guy? (I mean seriously blonde moment in mice thread)

QUOTE]

Yes it means I'm female lol.

Thanks for all the advice guys.

I looked into joining a Toastmasters club. It will force me to practice and face my fear regularly. There is one that meets every other Friday about five minutes from my house.

I read some member bios. It looks like most of the members are professionally successful and a few have even won public speaking competitions (didn't even know they had those) ... so I'll probably be the worst speaker there, but oh well, at least they know what they're doing and will be worth learning from.

[Vantek]

About the obvious answer, practice, all you really need IMO is just a few experiences where you delivered a solid performance. If you're not shy, that should give you enough of a confidence boost to very quickly overcome any anxiety.

Besides practice...

What I have used on myself is just repeating to myself how little sense this sort of anxiety makes (in most situations), just ramming this rational though into my consciousness - hard. I don't understand why people even have this. I suppose in cruel us-them caveman times, doing something stupid in front of a crowd actually could have had some very serious consequences (becoming a target for some group to persecute), so maybe that's where it comes from. In this day though it's just stupid. I don't know about you but for me just realising that makes me so furious at this silliness that the anger alone suppresses it lol.

Exactly what is going to happen when you stumble with your words? Is someone in the audience going to pull out a machine gun and turn you into swiss cheese? Will you lose everyone dear to you? Will everyone in the audience completely lose any respect they had for you? Truth is, noone is going to give a shit. Noone is going to even remember it the next day. Ironically they will notice much better a trembling, worried performance. At least for me, realizing this gives a lot of RRRROOOOAARRRR!!!! kind of mental determination. Sounds a bit like a guy thing though >< So maybe just calmly enforce how nothing significantly bad could possibly happen and everything's gonna be just fine (lol)

That being said, I actually have quite the problem in that it's hard for me to deliver fluent quality text. It just demands serious effort. Nevermind the crowd, I would have just as hard a time delivering it alone, much the same way that I have difficulties writing stuff. Against this thorough preparation is obviously the key, and more longer term excercise type practice.